E-ZOOS.BIZ

Did you know? Turtles have been around for over 200 million years, which means they watched the dinosaurs come AND go. They're basically the universe's way of saying "slow and steady really does win the race."

A turtle's shell is actually part of its skeleton, made of about 60 bones fused together. So when you see a turtle, you're basically looking at someone who turned their ribcage into a mobile home. Respect.

FUN FACT: Sea turtles can hold their breath for up to 7 hours while sleeping. Meanwhile, I get winded walking up stairs. Life isn't fair.

IMPORTANT DISTINCTION: Turtles live in water, tortoises live on land. If you call a tortoise a turtle, it won't correct you, but it WILL silently judge you for the rest of its 150-year lifespan.